does it matter if your heart doesn't beat faster?

after a year, well, ok over a year, i'm ready to date again.

i'm actually attracted to men again. and men who don't fit the profile of the types of guys i normally am attracted to.

i had dinner at savannah's place the other night. she'd invited english guy as well, and turned out it was just the three of us. the yenta.

what can i say, the man can cook and drives a vintage convertible. he had me after the first bite.

and bite he did when we ended up back at mine after dinner. it's nice being held all night, i'd forgotten how nice it is to feel the warmth of someone cute right next to you.

the thing is, except for the one who got away, no one has made my heart beat faster for the longest time. is that important? or is that infatuation that stops once you're grown up?

he's gone away for a few days, but he said he'd email me. funny thing that. he has my number from my email signature, but he never calls. so i can't figure out if he's just not that into me, or he's into me but playing games, or maybe, he's just got so much to sort out at the moment he doesn't want to get involved.

not that i'm ready to get involved. but it's just nice to be liked by someone who you think is kinda sexy.

not surprisingly, he hasn't emailed. i guess i violated the three day rule and emailed him first. i had a valid excuse as i'd promised for work purposes to introduce him to a friend of mine. he replied to her but not to me, so go figure. maybe i'm wasting my time again. once you're past your twenties it just feels like such a hassle. it's still fun, but mostly it's just annoying to be wanting someone to call you.

what is it about men in london? i'd like to think that seeing someone naked means you should at least call to say it was nice meeting you but i'm a commitmentphobe so you won't be hearing from me again. that at least lets you cross them off your list and move on to the next guy.