i'm confused. which is not a unique state of being for me.

attraction is a strange thing. there's sexual attraction, then there's that deep foundation that makes you want to be with someone. and these days, it seems that it's all about sexual attraction.

living in a city means you sleep with many random people. it's a numbers game.

i kinda like two boys at the moment. i've developed an attachment to chemistry boy which is not healthy, considering what our mutual friend warned me about. then there's my close friend lucinda's roommate, who i kissed in a very drunk state last night. unlike mutual friend, lucinda is waxing lyrical about her roommate. she's selling this guy as a gentleman (yes, though for a gentleman he has some moves in bed but maybe that's just an english rough-under-the-surface thing), well loved, extremely clever, and great on paper. chemistry boy on the other hand was described as 'strange' though nice guy.

and the thing is, i just can't bring myself to sleep with gentleman guy. i don't know if it's because i'm physically more attracted to chemistry boy, or i just don't want to risk the warth of lucinda should things go pear shaped. it's hard for friends when their friends date and it doesn't work out. loyalties are divided, relationship boarders are drawn, and eventually everyone gets sick of being switzerland.