i haven't seen much of spy guy lately.

i like to think he's rationing me. any more than once a month and it's more than what this is - whatever it is - and he would get attached, and he doesn't want to get attached. or maybe he's attached already and doesn't want to fall deeper.

or maybe he's really busy, what with work and travel and all. though given he's back home a lot, well, maybe he's reconciling with the ex.

the realistic part of me knows that the itch is being scratched elsewhere - home,  london, just not in my apartment. and given we're friends who get naked, does that mean he doesn't find me that great in bed and has to seek elsewhere? if he's in love with someone else, then his only reason to sleep with me would be due to very good sex - so maybe he doesn't find it that good if he can resist it. does that mean i've become bad in bed?

from what i know of men, they need sex at least once a week (the exception being the boyfriend), so given his personality (arrogant) and his job, i would imagine he is sleeping with a few other ladies in this fine town of ours.

it's not love or a relationship, so given it's just sex why would he not take frequent advantage of our geographical proximity?

he once made a comment about going slow to avoid a burn out - that friendships last longer without an accelerated pace. is this observation from his past experience? or that we're just different personalities (i grab what i can, he savors what he has)? or an excuse to stop having me jump him whenever the urge takes me?