it's friday night, i just got home, am exhausted, should definitely have gone to nyc for the weekend (though would have missed my connection at lhr) and have a night of pizza or whatever is in the fridge the boys have leftover to look forward to.

if the last guy who happened upon this blog when i accidentally left it open (trust is an overrated thing) is snooping (luckily this blog doesn't get enough hits to be searchable i think) he would be enjoying an ego boost of ridiculous proportions that i am for a friday night at home typing whilst he's busy with the love of his life.

think i'm a bit cranky as i just came home from the city of angels, where everyone has shiny hair and teeth, zero body fat and permanent help at home. the thing with being over the hill is the things that never used to bother you do now. the fact that you can't hold down a relationship, you don't meet someone you like enough to put yourself out there for, you don't meet someone who likes who you really are, but thinks you are amazing because, well frankly you're still hot and fun and smart and nice and thus makes them feel better about themselves and you give them the confidence to go out to meet someone they want to be with who is dirtier in bed than you (ok that's not possible, even i can acknowledge that true love makes sex better and hotter).

sometimes i think if i'm such a good transitional person for so many men across the ny-lon (and parts of chicago, sf, la and oregon), where is my equivalent?