why do bad things happen to exes you like?

tonight a friend rolled by the ol' blighty for a whistlestop tour. as he's out on tomorrow's red eye we persuaded him to come out for one drink. well, one very large drink that ended up in five scotch glasses.

harrison was an old friend from college. whilst we were close, he was closer to his crew, many whom grew up within a five minute walk of his parent's place on long island. ten years ago i happened to date one of these friends, and thus hung out with his crew. said friend and i ended in a bad way. it was the first time i'd been dumped, and in a very harsh way too. i hated this guy for ages. then i got over it. and a few months after i decided it was all water under the bridge, he apologised. which worked out well as i wasn't that upset that i could graciously accept his apology, and knew that he meant it.

caitlin and i popped by harrison's hotel room and were soon in stitches. but after about 30mins he shared with us what he'd just learnt about my ex. that he'd been sick, really sick, and we don't know if he will get better. and it felt weird to hear that. i no longer have feelings for this guy, but he's someone whom i do wish well, and i frequently think of him and wonder how he's doing.

it's just such a shock to hear that a strong, healthy, virile young man is ill. and though he did indulge in a bit of a party lifestyle in the past, he certainly by all accounts has become a very healthy man, tobacco free and sporadic in alcohol consumption. it made me feel sad, but as we'd grown apart it was quite a surreal kind of sadness.